the sun still shines

i better write this down before this thought runs away..

whatever happens, life goes on, ants kept crawling, stomach will still go hungry...

the sun will diligently shine the next day, bright and early

nightfall will come when the sun sets..

in a nutshell, life goes on.. so, take everything lightly, as light as a pinch of salt and pepper.. and appreciate whats here and now, coz whats here and now will never come again, not tomorrow not the next life, not ever.. it will be gone.. whats left are memories.. good or bad memories? you shape it.. its all up to you.. make the best out of life.. because, life goes on and on and will not stop..

ups and downs

highs and lows
when you feel that things are going fine
or so you thought they are well and good

then all of the sudden they come crashing down
when you are least guarded
thats when you realise that

life's like that
something unexpected will happen unexpectedly
crawling behind you and
boo!

shock you to your senses
shock you to reality
shock you out of your reverie

that is life

in a world of our own,
dreams live on

but in this reality
life smacks you in the face
are you awake yet?

i feel

'JIWANGGG' most of the time!!!

hate youuuu.... the one who caused this....

it has been

a crazy past few weeks, really...
work's been hectic as ever and i felt as dumb as ever coz there's just so much to learn and perhaps im not cutout for the job, man... so tough, so tough...

on another note, well, ive been trying to fill my time with tons of activity, trying to stay normal and sane and be not jiwang, but failed miserably almost everytime. it has not been easy, but am doing good i suppose, given my current state of condition which is shittier than shit itself. hanging out or working my weekend away seems like a routine now. thank god for great frens and work to keep my mind busy as ever. it has not been easy, i dont know why am i repeating this, but yes, it has indeed not been easy.

but quoting the horsey in "Babe": i will work harder...

coz it aint easy living.

wot i need to do now...

is to gradually let it glide and hoping it will fade away. to the extent i will forget all about it and hopefully start afresh.
had some light shed on me, heed some signs and deciphered the meanings behind them. i know wot to do now.

i am not saying its going to be easy. in fact, i think its going to be one hell of a period of time. only time will tell. yes, time oh glorious time...

i will force u out of my head or rather, hid u far far behind my serebrum so that its so hidden it cant be detected. yeah, thats where i should place you coz i dont know any other way than do that. just that for me to resort to. the residue of methods for me to use.

odd

nothing's changed... why is that?
can someone shed some light on me? i am getting blurred here...

nothingness

feelin low lately... heck, its lower than low. this time, its harder to take than the previous. i thought it would be easier coz its supposed to be a deja vu, but no, it is doubly hard n tougher than i can bear. people around me can sense and tell me im not looking so good. they know me better than myself. i dont know how to handle it anymore. i kept asking into the vast air, can u come back? will u come back? will it be the same again? ever? or this is it? of course there is always no answer to my genuine questions.

i felt like im being played. again, its self imposed, all voluntary, all mutual. but nonetheless this is not a good feeling. i felt like i am left alone here while u are over there so far away. have u forgotten about me? will u ever remember me? will i be the special one to u? will i? again, there's always no answer to my genuine questions.

baffled, im baffled by questions.. questions unanswered, longing for the questions to be answered, wanting to know so badly.

i dont know how long i need to wake up from slumber.. defo more than a couple of months like u expected. sory, but this is tougher than i anticipated and i dont know wot to do about it.